Joy Valerius Poetry http://joyvalerius.com I just want to be ... the wonderful person my dog thinks I am! Wed, 07 Mar 2018 03:58:11 +0000 en-US hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=5.2 http://joyvalerius.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/04/Logo-55218cb9v1_site_icon-75x75.png Joy Valerius Poetry http://joyvalerius.com 32 32 86874436 Finding My Way http://joyvalerius.com/finding-my-way/ Sat, 11 May 2019 02:17:13 +0000 http://joyvalerius.com/?p=1152 I’ve been writing poetry for a long time, but I still feel like I’m finding my way with my writing and publishing journey

I have written enough poems that I could publish several books. What I’m thinking about right now, is publishing a few smaller chap books, before I focus on a longer book.

I still want to make progress in sending my poems out to literary magazines, but I’m just so damn tired. As much as I want to get my poetry out there, I need to focus on my health.

It’s frustrating, having limitations that are constantly changing, …

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I’ve been writing poetry for a long time, but I still feel like I’m finding my way with my writing and publishing journey

I have written enough poems that I could publish several books. What I’m thinking about right now, is publishing a few smaller chap books, before I focus on a longer book.

I still want to make progress in sending my poems out to literary magazines, but I’m just so damn tired. As much as I want to get my poetry out there, I need to focus on my health.

It’s frustrating, having limitations that are constantly changing, but it is what it is. Time for me to snooze.

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April 3, 2019 http://joyvalerius.com/april-3-2019/ http://joyvalerius.com/april-3-2019/#comments Wed, 03 Apr 2019 23:07:55 +0000 http://joyvalerius.com/?p=1146 I feel a great sadness, at my lack of maintaining this website. I just keep forgetting about it. When I was actively working on publishing my book of dog poems, I found it easier to focus on my blog. I have been so distracted by my everyday life, and time keeps slipping by.

March 17th, I turned 60 years old. Donna and my friend Baihlah threw me a beautiful surprise party. It was wonderful ! I felt very loved ! In my mind, I’m still about 12 years old. I don’t feel 60. Even with the difficulties that can accompany …

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I feel a great sadness, at my lack of maintaining this website. I just keep forgetting about it. When I was actively working on publishing my book of dog poems, I found it easier to focus on my blog. I have been so distracted by my everyday life, and time keeps slipping by.

March 17th, I turned 60 years old. Donna and my friend Baihlah threw me a beautiful surprise party. It was wonderful ! I felt very loved ! In my mind, I’m still about 12 years old. I don’t feel 60. Even with the difficulties that can accompany aging, I feel very blessed with the wisdom and self love that I’m experiencing as I age.

Struggling with writing poetry for the past couple of months. Working on learning to send my poems out to literary magazines, that’s why I haven’t posted any here in awhile. Most magazines only publish unpublished poems. If I post a poem here on my blog, it is considered published.

Fatigue and inability to concentrate continue to plague me. I wish I could get my mind to do what I want it to do. I imagine many people feel this way too. I send my love out to the Universe, Dog love too !

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Life in the slow lane http://joyvalerius.com/life-in-the-slow-lane/ Fri, 30 Nov 2018 06:48:26 +0000 http://joyvalerius.com/?p=1139 You think that if something is important to you, you would remember to do it. That however, is not the case with me. When I started this blog I felt real gung ho. I was enthusiastic and committed. It was such an important part of where I was at, at that time. The importance of this blog has not changed for me.What has changed is life. These past two years in particular I have been dealing with various health issues.Breast Cancer, MS, Fibromyalgia, and most recently Benign Proxysimal Positional Vertigo.(BPPV) I’m dizzy all the time. I see a physical therapist …

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You think that if something is important to you, you would remember to do it. That however, is not the case with me. When I started this blog I felt real gung ho. I was enthusiastic and committed. It was such an important part of where I was at, at that time. The importance of this blog has not changed for me.What has changed is life. These past two years in particular I have been dealing with various health issues.Breast Cancer, MS, Fibromyalgia, and most recently Benign Proxysimal Positional Vertigo.(BPPV) I’m dizzy all the time. I see a physical therapist on Dec.3 where I will be taught a technique that should get rid of my dizziness, hopefully for good. But if it should come back I will know what to do, to turn it around, pun intended…

With these health issues I often find it difficult to concentrate. I have many cognitive difficulties as a result of the MS, and stress. I have a hard time focusing. I have a hard time remembering things, recalling words. I can be writing a poem and by the time I have written down the first part of my line, I can’t remember the rest of the line I was going to write. It makes for some very incomplete poems. It’s hard for me to focus right now, as I write this. My life has been taken over by life, hence my absence from this blog.

It is time for me to try to return to my poetry and this blog. I am working on putting my second collection of poetry together to be published. I’m going to be doing more T-shirt sales, with my poems on them, so be on the look out for them in the hopefully near future.

I sometimes feel like I am the only one that reads my blog, as if it is a blog of one. I hope to change that soon, and work harder at reaching more people.If anyone reads this, I hope you “Like” it and leave a comment.Thanks ! Here’s to more poetry !

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Getting Organized http://joyvalerius.com/getting-organized/ Mon, 03 Sep 2018 06:38:46 +0000 http://joyvalerius.com/?p=1135 I have spent the last six months organizing my house. Cleaning out drawers and closets, getting rid of a lot of stuff. My friend Baihlah says, “Save the best, lose the rest.” I tried to follow that theme as I’ve gone through each drawer, closet, and room. Donna and I have lightened our load immensely.

For the last 3 months my dear friend and editor Cristina, has been helping me to organize my poetry. We have been learning together how to use more of the features offered by Scrivener, the Writing app I use for writing my poetry. We have …

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I have spent the last six months organizing my house. Cleaning out drawers and closets, getting rid of a lot of stuff. My friend Baihlah says, “Save the best, lose the rest.” I tried to follow that theme as I’ve gone through each drawer, closet, and room. Donna and I have lightened our load immensely.

For the last 3 months my dear friend and editor Cristina, has been helping me to organize my poetry. We have been learning together how to use more of the features offered by Scrivener, the Writing app I use for writing my poetry. We have made great progress with it. I have entered a couple of poetry contests, and will soon start submitting my poems to literary magazines. I would love to hear from other poets, about their submitting experiences.

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I’m Back ! http://joyvalerius.com/im-back-2/ Sat, 30 Jun 2018 04:30:41 +0000 http://joyvalerius.com/?p=1131 I truly don’t know how almost 4 months have passed since writing on my blog.I guess I had a lot of things going on. I’m May I had surgery to remove my ovaries and Fallopian Tubes.I’m at a higher risk for getting ovarian cancer due to family history of cancer. I also started on a new drug for my MS, and had to adjust to its side effects, while dealing with some bad side effects of yet another medication. It was causing severe depression, so I went off of it. It was a hormone blocker that my oncologist wanted me …

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I truly don’t know how almost 4 months have passed since writing on my blog.I guess I had a lot of things going on. I’m May I had surgery to remove my ovaries and Fallopian Tubes.I’m at a higher risk for getting ovarian cancer due to family history of cancer. I also started on a new drug for my MS, and had to adjust to its side effects, while dealing with some bad side effects of yet another medication. It was causing severe depression, so I went off of it. It was a hormone blocker that my oncologist wanted me to take, to reduce my chances of a reocurrance of cancer. I see my oncologist in Sept, and will decide if I will go on a different medication. I’ve also had multiple flare ups of MS symptoms.

I have also been struggling with writing my poetry. I just feel unhappy with what I’m writing. I’ve been writing some pretty bad poetry. I hope it will lead me to the good stuff. I’m keeping at it though, everyday I write.I’m also compiling poems for the next book of poetry I want to publish. It feels like a daunting task right now. I’m excited about it, and know I will do things a little different this time around.

Time to rest my weary bones. To all, a good night.

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Let There Be Darkness http://joyvalerius.com/let-there-be-darkness/ Wed, 07 Mar 2018 03:58:11 +0000 http://joyvalerius.com/?p=1127 In the beginning
God said,

“Let there be Darkness,”
and Trump was born.

He watched as the Dark
began to inherit the earth.

He pounded his fist
in Trump tantrum style,

and bellowed
“What have I done

creating this crazy
bunch?”

They crossed the line
went straight to hell.

The bell knelled
for the rest of us,

things had to change.

We knew if we waited
just a bit longer,

the flames would consume
Trump and his gang,

Trying to be God
incinerated his being,

hopefully his rule will
soon be over.…

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In the beginning
God said,

“Let there be Darkness,”
and Trump was born.

He watched as the Dark
began to inherit the earth.

He pounded his fist
in Trump tantrum style,

and bellowed
“What have I done

creating this crazy
bunch?”

They crossed the line
went straight to hell.

The bell knelled
for the rest of us,

things had to change.

We knew if we waited
just a bit longer,

the flames would consume
Trump and his gang,

Trying to be God
incinerated his being,

hopefully his rule will
soon be over.

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Yikes ! http://joyvalerius.com/yikes/ Wed, 07 Mar 2018 03:49:41 +0000 http://joyvalerius.com/?p=1125 It’s March 6,2018 and I haven’t posted for months. Since my last post my chest wound has healed completely. I guess I got so busy living my life that I forgot about writing on my blog.

I really believed 2018 was going to be a better year, but the way this year has started out, it doesn’t appear so. Donna and I have just gotten over the flu. We were sick for 3 weeks. Then Friday I broke off my front teeth and my cap. I am not a happy camper. Implants were recommended. I will be spending the week …

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It’s March 6,2018 and I haven’t posted for months. Since my last post my chest wound has healed completely. I guess I got so busy living my life that I forgot about writing on my blog.

I really believed 2018 was going to be a better year, but the way this year has started out, it doesn’t appear so. Donna and I have just gotten over the flu. We were sick for 3 weeks. Then Friday I broke off my front teeth and my cap. I am not a happy camper. Implants were recommended. I will be spending the week doing research on my options, and looking for funding to help pay for it. It feels so overwhelming.

On March 14, my dog Mabel will have surgery for a cherry eye. I pray the surgery will be successful. My other dogs are doing pretty good.

I continue to write my poetry, though I’m not real happy with what I’ve been writing. It feels like a struggle to me right now. I could not write when I was sick, and am slow to get back to it. I’ve been writing a lot of junk poems. Still waiting to get to the gems.

I hope to write on my blog more frequently again, but for now, good night !

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My Wound Vac http://joyvalerius.com/my-wound-vac/ Tue, 21 Nov 2017 04:26:14 +0000 http://joyvalerius.com/?p=1103 I carry this machine around
like an elephant ear.

The implications
are hard to swallow.

Plastic hosing sucks
fluid from my wound

like an elephant taking
a drink with its trunk.

Heavy, bigger than
its actual size,

meaning is lost among
most,

as it is amongst
poachers.

But I know,

I know,
its meaning

like the elephant’s
footprint

on my throat.…

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I carry this machine around
like an elephant ear.

The implications
are hard to swallow.

Plastic hosing sucks
fluid from my wound

like an elephant taking
a drink with its trunk.

Heavy, bigger than
its actual size,

meaning is lost among
most,

as it is amongst
poachers.

But I know,

I know,
its meaning

like the elephant’s
footprint

on my throat.

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I Named my Wound Vac Betsy http://joyvalerius.com/named-wound-vac-betsy/ Tue, 21 Nov 2017 04:21:45 +0000 http://joyvalerius.com/?p=1101 Betsy is my bestie right now,
she is always
at my side.

She grooms my wound
keeps me attuned to,
any changes taking place.

She stimulates my healing,
sucking debris from
my chest.

She is the kind of friend
that comes around in
a person’s time of need.

Soon the need will be gone,
and she will be moving on,
though her time was well spent.

I am grateful for her support
and all she did to help,
she is free now to go help someone else.…

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Betsy is my bestie right now,
she is always
at my side.

She grooms my wound
keeps me attuned to,
any changes taking place.

She stimulates my healing,
sucking debris from
my chest.

She is the kind of friend
that comes around in
a person’s time of need.

Soon the need will be gone,
and she will be moving on,
though her time was well spent.

I am grateful for her support
and all she did to help,
she is free now to go help someone else.

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Healing Forward http://joyvalerius.com/healing-forward/ Tue, 21 Nov 2017 04:19:25 +0000 http://joyvalerius.com/?p=1097 I can’t believe it has been almost a month since I posted anything. Having this chest wound that needs to heal, really shows me just how powerless I am. I am doing everything I know, to get this wound to heal. I’m eating protein like crazy, I’m eating lots of pineapple, and taking extra vitamin C, both help promote wound healing. I’m hooked up to a wound vac which I have to wear 24/7. And yet, I can’t control how fast this thing is going to heal. It is going to take as long as it is going to take. …

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I can’t believe it has been almost a month since I posted anything. Having this chest wound that needs to heal, really shows me just how powerless I am. I am doing everything I know, to get this wound to heal. I’m eating protein like crazy, I’m eating lots of pineapple, and taking extra vitamin C, both help promote wound healing. I’m hooked up to a wound vac which I have to wear 24/7. And yet, I can’t control how fast this thing is going to heal. It is going to take as long as it is going to take.

I’m feeling so incredibly tired all the time, fighting off nausea and dizziness every day. My nurse reminds me that my body is using a lot of my energy to heal this wound. It is also a daily reminder that I had cancer. I’m forced to look at the trauma my chest has suffered. Kinda puts a wrench in my denial, that I wasn’t really affected by cancer.

I find myself holding my breath every time I look at myself in a mirror. I see the scars where my breasts used to be, and I find it difficult to breathe. I’m feeling so much, yet I’m not always certain, what it is exactly,that I’m feeling.

The one thing I do know, is that I’m ready to put this episode of my life behind me,where there will be no reruns.

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